I met an old classmate of mine recently. We hadn’t seen each other in about twenty years. We have exchanged birthday greetings on Facebook over the last four years though.
Then I remembered how we were always talking then.
It was then that I had a swift journey into my past. I checked out the several people I have had to relate with over the years at different times.
Some relationships just have expiry dates and there is nothing you can do about it. Any attempt to make that kind of relationship have a longer lifespan than what it should may leave both parties hurt and they will have to part ways on a not too good note.
My mother once told me something that has stuck with me since then.
She said, “Some people were relevant in your past but not any more. Some others are relevant in your life at the moment and may soon not be again and some others are set to be relevant in your future. A few however would be a part of your life through all the seasons of your life.”
Now here’s the lesson to go by:
She told me, “Be grateful for the seasonal relationships and never take for granted the ’till death do us part’ relationships”.
I have found her statement to be very true.
I have had several relationships that lasted different durations.
A particular one that served as the beginning of my new perspective was one that ended a couple of years ago. What really happened was that my spirit felt totally disconnected from that person at a point after a few years of friendship. But I couldn’t seem to let go when my relationship with that person practically hit the rocks. I thought that cutting ties with that person was a sign of unforgiveness even after I had prayed about it. I harboured some sort of guilt for being responsible for the death of that relationship.
But then after a lot of struggle, my mind was put to rest when I just was convinced that the “time for embrace” was over.
Of course we still talk to each other even now but no longer at the depth we had grown to at a point.
Don’t feel disappointed when a particular relationship just won’t work no matter how hard you try. The only caution is to be sure you don’t harbour any form of resentment against the other party.
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. . . A time to embrace and a time to turn away. (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 5b NLT)
Align your spirit with God’s purpose for every relationship you find yourself in.
That is the only time you will be able to gladly let go of relationships that have fulfilled their purposes and gallantly enter into others.
Enjoy your relationships for as long as they last.
Always seek to discover the purpose of every relationship you are in.
Pursue only purposeful relationships.
And never let go of relationships that are meant to last no matter the storm that rages against that your relation-ship.
-OMOSEBI Mary Omolola (PhD)