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False Health


During the course of my first year in the university, I fell ill and some of my roommates ‘dragged’ me to the University Health Centre for treatment (I didn’t want to go there).

I was told that I was down with malaria and was given some injections and because I had an exam the next day, I requested to be allowed to return to my hostel immediately and I was obliged.

How can I forget the speed with which I walked or was it ran till I got close to the hostel? Those who went with me had to run after me. The ailing one seemed to have more energy than those who were physically fine at the time. My roommates thought there was something wrong with me because I couldn’t even walk without help to the health center.

A few meters to my hostel, I sat into a culvert totally exhausted. I could not move again at that point. My friends caught up with me, panting from the compulsory exercise I had forced them to go through and they practically carried me to my bed in the hostel.

I remembered this incidence a while ago and I thought to share some lessons that were impressed on my heart as I smiled away, remembering that incidence…

There are two lessons…

  1. There are some people who go around doing “exploits” yet are totally void of any inner strength. Empty barrels they say, make the loudest noise. It is such an unwise thing to focus on expending energy probably because you wish to keep up appearances while you refuse to recharge as frequently as you should. While you help others out of their low estate, make sure that you take time out to focus on yourself too. Take cognisance of when you begin to run your life on reserve. Better still, make it a continuous/constant action to take time out for refreshing yourself. Else you reach a point in life where you have the appearance of being alive when you are actually completely dead and dry within.

  2. Don’t wear yourself out. Just like I expended all my energy because of the brisk action I had taken by running when it was evident that I wasn’t capable of doing so, you would wear yourself out if you are biting more than you can chew. You need to understand your capacity and walk within those limits. It is not about the quantity of work you put into life but the quality thereof. It has to be value over volume.

Got it?

  • OMOSEBI Mary Omolola, PhD

P. S. Wanna share something impressed on your heart from this story? Feel free to share in the comment section below.

Reading is Key to Gaining Knowledge

When the Pharisees came to Jesus with the query about divorce, Jesus gave them an epic answer which keeps ringing in my brain always.

Jesus asked them, “Have you not read?” (Matthew 19:4)


In order words, if you had read you would have known the answer to the question you are asking now.

You are where you are as a result of the kind of information you expose yourself too. It is not cool to spend all your time and money on stuff that benefit your body while leaving your mind untended.

Personally, I have written several books on different subject matters that will answer your questions on specific issues. Books serve as manuals to ease the burden on the ‘counselor’ to answer these same questions over and over again when you can easily grab a copy of a book in which the author has emptied his/her soul.

For instance, in my book BUILDING A BEAUTIFUL MARRIAGE I wrote about several aspects of married life.

I dedicated a chapter in the book to address husbands and another chapter the wives; on how to get the lovemaking aspect of your marriage enjoyable.

Did you know that there’s a scientific reason some wives don’t enjoy lovemaking in marriage?

You can find out what this is about, why this is so and what you can do about it in that book. Take it or leave it, lovemaking in marriage is VERY essential to the overall health of your marriage.

I wrote THE POLISHED SINGLE for single ladies and gentlemen; to help you maximise your single years and in turn prepare you for marriage if you decide to get married.

I have a complete manual for every woman who desires to live a balanced life — THE BEAUTIFUL BRANCH. I discussed extensively on issues that concern single women, wives, mothers, your career, you impacting your world and your spiritual growth and development.

My latest is a book that everyone should read- I AM A WOMAN (God’s definition of ME). It is a book that will fine tune your mindset about the female-man whether you are a man or woman.

I have 3 books written basically for your spiritual growth (WASHED, LIVE THE CHRIST LIFE & FOOD FOR YOUR SPIRIT).

Now that’s not all… I wrote one on parenting and I believe it will be a blessing to you if you haven’t read it. I am giving that one out FREE. It’s RAISING SEXUALLY PURE CHILDREN.

My greatest motivation for writing these books is love for people and that includes YOU!

Let me tell you free of charge, READING IS KEY TO GAINING KNOWLEDGE!

Seek knowledge with all zeal as if your life depended on it (your life depends on it anyway).




I was scrolling through Facebook News feed a while ago when I came across the beautiful picture of a beautiful woman, posted by one of my friends from way back. The picture had no caption and I had almost clicked on the LIKE button when I decided to read through the comments section first.

The comments all implied that the person in the picture had passed away because they were condolence messages to the person who had put up the post. I thought to myself what it would have meant for me to just have clicked the like or love button… Would it have meant that I loved that the person was bereaved or what exactly?????

You see, there is usually more to people than we can all see.

No one goes around with a ‘caption’ to his/her head announcing the struggles he/she is passing through in closet.

And this is reason I like to sometimes make excuses for people who act badly towards me. I am usually of the opinion that they might be dealing with some really tough situations hence their reactions.

They usually say that “First impressions last forever”. That could be true. But should we really judge people based on the first impressions only? I really do not think so. What if that first impression is induced by some nasty things they are going through at the moment?

In any case, this is my heart going out to everyone fighting a “private” battle. You know where and how much it hurts.

I can’t categorically say that i understand what you are going through. But my heart prays for you.

God sees your “midnight cries”. He knows the depth of your hurt/struggles and He is right there with you. He will never leave or forsake you.

He will come through for you at just the time He knows is just perfect.

If He is letting you go through what you are now, He will definitely bring you through it. And you will arrive safely at the other end of that river.

Cast all your cares on Him for He cares for you!

May the peace of God that passes all human reasoning be your portion Now and forever!

© OMOSEBI Mary Omolola, PhD

Increase Your Capacity

The other day, I heard the Holy Spirit minister to my Spirit these words: “Many people pray that God should bless them when they are not ready to take the blessing”

Let me expand this to you:

If blessings or increase happen to an unprepared person, he will definitely fumble because he has not the ability to properly utilize the blessings or manage the increase.

…Some people mess up with their marriages because they are not mature enough for that level of responsibility nor have they developed their ability to relate properly with people around them.

…Some people get hold of power and/or money and practically become terrorists because they are not fit to manage them properly.

… Opportunity for uplifting comes to others and they cannot be considered for them because they are not fully equipped professionally.

When the widow of the prophet in the fourth chapter of the book of second kings ran to Elisha about how she was in debt and the creditor was threatening to take her sons from her, he asked her to go borrow vessels.

She had to prepare the container first. Not until she had done that did the blessing in form of the oil begin to flow.

Even Jabez prayed that God should enlarge his coasts.

This is what I want you to get from this:

You need to build your capacity for the blessing you so desire. In other words, prepare yourself for the height you look forward to; groom yourself for success.

“Enlarge the place of thy tent, and let them stretch forth the curtains of thine habitations: spare not, lengthen thy cords, and strengthen thy stakes” (Isaiah 54:2 KJV)

The New Living Translation puts that same verse this way:

“Enlarge your house; build an addition. Spread out your home, and spare no expense!” (Isaiah 54:2)

When it comes to building your capacity, you must be ready to go to the farthest length and make the greatest form of investment possible.

How can you increase the capacity of your vessel?

Do things that will make you grow in all ramifications.

Here are some examples :

… Eat the Word of God like no man’s business.
… Dedicate time to fellowship with God like never before.
… Read books that will grow your understanding and prepare you for what’s coming in the future.
… Develop strength of character.
… Improve your emotional intelligence.
… Go back to school and get better educated.

… Borrow like that widow if you have to.

Just make sure that you enlarge your vessel. Look inwards and discover in what aspects you need to build your capacity.

“Study to show yourself APPROVED unto God” says Paul to Timothy.

Timothy was admonished to invest in himself so that he could become fit for the height that was prepared for him.

In the case of the widow that I began this post with, the oil ran out immediately there were no more containers.

Some people don’t get their blessings because they don’t have the capacity to hold it in while those who get those ‘blessings’ without being fully able to take them on are those that mess it all up.

I pray that God will grant you deep understanding of these words in Jesus’ name!

Thank God It’s Friday


That is the usual chant of many people on Fridays; and probably that includes you.

But why are you thanking God specially that it’s Friday?

Many people make that statement because they feel relief that the working days of the week have come to an end and they are free from the bondage they call work.


They don’t find fulfillment doing what they do. They are only doing those things because they have to make ends meet.

How many times do you say, “Thank God it’s Monday?”

It’s fine if you thank God that it’s Friday as much as you do when it’s Monday or Wednesday.

If you aren’t ever excited that you are beginning a new week on your work then maybe you have some real evaluation to carry out and some drastic changes to make.

Don’t you think that living a fulfilled life is very important?

Do you know there is a difference between LIVING and EXISTING?

Here’s a challenging question for you:

Would you rather work doing something you are not passionate about, but make millions of dollars/naira OR love your work and make just enough to get by?

What will it be?

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Book Excerpts: Raising Sexually Pure Children

If we will be true to ourselves we will see how much of a herculean task it is to raise sexually pure children in this time and age.
It is rather sad that so much is happening in our world today which indicates that the environmental conditions are just not too favourable. We hear stories of children being molested virtually every day by people who are meant to take care of them.

This is a call for concern. It is a situation that should make us “be at attention” as parents.
The truth is that things that many people my age did not get to hear/know about when we were in our early teenage years are things that some infants are exposed to today.
The peculiarity of this generation makes things like discussing the topic of this book like I am now, something that we cannot afford to take with levity.

Our children will have to relate with other people at one point or the other in their lives no matter how much we try to shield them from the world. We cannot be with them every second of the day hence the need to equip them adequately because we do not have control over what goes on with those other people that they get to relate with most especially when they are not under our watch. Now, that’s the real deal in this matter.
The truth is that many parents shy away from teaching their children about sex. In this generation however, we need to be wary of making the same mistakes some of our own parents made.
No one is saying you should teach them how to have sex.

Sex education is about equipping your children/teenagers with age appropriate knowledge about sex/sexuality.
It is primarily the duty of parents to equip their children with knowledge pertaining to sex and sexuality. It is not advisable to delegate these teachings to the media or other people generally. If you don’t want them to inculcate wrong ideas from unverified sources, you better do the needful.
They will get to know about these things whether you teach them or not anyway.
It is therefore imperative, following the dynamics of this generation not to be “slow” with passing on required knowledge about sex to your children.

Another very important thing is for parents to truly love and care for their children.
I remember how back in the day, my mother would buy assorted stuff out of her meagre salary any time she could and share amongst my siblings and I. She would tell us things like, “You can’t say that you don’t know what corned beef or cheese, etc tastes like…” She would say to us that she didn’t want us to get out of the home and start feeling like anything was a big deal. She would take us to parks for picnics and those memories are stuck in my mental faculty. It was as though she had planned to do something different for us once she got her salary every month.
I tell you, this act moulded my mentality. Yes, I wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth but nothing ever felt like a big deal to me.

So even when I got into the university and eateries were getting common (with which a number of girls were enticed), it was still no big deal for me even though I had not been in one at that time.
I will like to add at this point that you should not forget to teach your children about contentment too.
This is very important because if they refuse to learn how to be contented with whatever they have, they stand at a risk of being enticed with gifts from potential predators no matter what you provide for them.
Love your children in words and actions. Be sure to tell your children that you love them. Embrace them lovingly. Fill their love-tanks with loving words and actions constantly. This will boost their self-esteem and in turn help them not to go on with their lives being needy for affection.

When they are convinced of the fact that you love them, no one will be able to deceive them with some fake love somewhere.

You really need to be your child’s best friend. Your child should be able to trust you and feel free to talk to you about anything and everything. They should be able to discuss with you as friend with friend. It is therefore imperative that you develop a good rapport with your children.

This excerpt was also published by BELLANAIJA.COM. Click here to read it on bellanaija blog



Please, How Do You Do It?

There is something I need your help explaining to me… This is an issue that I have always wondered about. I have had several reasons to wonder how two things that seem to be incompatible can be exhibited in the very same space.

A Nollywood movie I watched a few days ago actually brought this issue back to mind and I knew it was time I spoke about my worries thus the conception of this post.

In that movie, there was this guy who deprived his wife of sex for about 3 months or more after the wedding. I mean from day one… No honeymoon things.

His commonest excuse was that they needed to pray. It was either that he just had a nightmare when the wife makes advances at him or that he was observing lent in August. Even on their wedding night, it was prayer that they prayed till they both slept off and I was like, “Are you kidding me?”

The wife kept suffering in silence. She was deeply frustrated.

To cut the long story short, he kept using the issue of prayer to camouflage his obvious purpose of punishing his wife.

Now, this was the real issue which he refused to reveal until after the lady attempted suicide:

The wife had stolen money from the husband’s late brother (whom she worked with as a secretary) which she gave this same man to travel out of the country with. It was during the period when they were out of the country that the elder brother died from a stroke linked to the money which was stolen from him; when he couldn’t resuscitate his business or make ends meet.

He had later sponsored the lady to join him overseas and returned to the country together for their wedding. Upon their return, the man took his fiancee to meet his sister-in-law and that was when he got to know about what had transpired between his wife-to-be and elder brother.

So, instead of confronting the lady or calling off the wedding he went ahead to marry her with the intention of punishing her.

Did I mention that while the wife from suffering from deprivation, this man had a side-chic that was performing his wife’s conjugal duties?

What am I driving at with my narration?

I have seen people who profess to be believers and sometimes can pray like fire would descend right there in their prayer rooms act terribly towards people around them.

I have seen pastors who are skilled in dividing the Word of truth beat their wives blue-black upon every slight provocation.

I have seen tongue-talking, fire spitting believers rob their bosses or involved in fraudulent activities at their places of work.

And all I can ask within myself is, “How do they do it?”

How do you harbour sin yet are able to pray?

How do you keep malice and are still able to raise ‘holy hands’ to the Lord?

How are you able to steal money and yet bring the tithe to church?

How do you abuse your spouse physically or emotionally and still be able to stand before the congregation of the righteous with your hypocritical smiles?

How do you call yourself a child of God and still act like that of the devil?

How can light and darkness live in the same vessel at the same time?

…Because the Holy Spirit I know will always call you out when you are out of line.

Something must definitely be wrong somewhere then, I conclude…

Either you are not born again in the first instance or you have decided to continually ignore the voice of the Holy Spirit to you.

This is a call to you reading this to examine your ways.

Check where you have fallen from and make amends. Allow yourself to be thoroughly broken down, have a circumcised heart which is sensitive to the voice of the Holy Spirit and decide to begin to obey Him always.

May your eyes be opened to those areas of your life that are not conforming to the standards of the Word of God.

And may grace be multiplied unto you as you decide to repent of your ungodly ways!

©OMOSEBI Mary Omolola


Teaching Your Child About Wins and Losses



Some weeks ago, one of the mummies I met on Facebook who is a proprietress contacted me to ask for permission to publish one of my articles in the school’s magazine (You can read the article HERE)

Coincidentally, just a few weeks after that I was in a secondary school to fellowship with the students on a Sunday morning. One of the girls that asked to speak with me after the ministration told me how sad she was. She said she had low self-esteem (her words). She told me that her classmates make fun of her because she was poor with spellings. Amazingly, this same girl was the class monitor for her class. And I sure know they don’t make dullards class monitors. She was good with other things in school but a singular weakness was greatly capitalized on.

I did all I could to encourage her to believe in herself and never to think of herself as a failure. I told her to focus on her strengths too. I made her realize that even if she came last in class, it still didn’t make her a failure. It just tells her that she needs to put in more effort.

Gladly, she left feeling relieved.

You see, parents have a lot to do with instilling the right attitude in their children.

Parents need to show their children the right lens through which they should view life. We need to make them realise that they are wonderfully and fearfully made by God and that they are not less human because they are not performing as well as their counterparts.

In the same vein, they need to learn never to look down on anyone because they seem to be doing better than they are.

Teach them what success really means. Real success is not earned by comparing your achievements with others. It is all about fulfilling God’s purpose for you. You’re a success when you live up to God’s expectations of you; not man’s.

They should strive for excellence in being the best version of themselves and not wanting to be someone else. They can learn excellent virtues from others. And there is nothing bad in them allowing themselves to be motivated by the successes of others.

However, they must be trained never to lose their identity while in the pursuance of excellence. They need to embrace and appreciate their uniqueness.

When they ‘win’, they must thank God for the grace to win.

And when they ‘lose’, let them embrace their loss with dignity as they believe that it can only get better with the help of God and due diligence.

May God bless our children!

Photo credit : thestar

Cultivate Your Garden

The newest addition to my library

About 20years ago, our youth fellowship president who doubled as my school father asked me a question which was brought to my remembrance recently. He asked me who my role model was in ministry and without thinking twice on that particular day I said, “JOYCE MEYER”.

I love Joyce Meyer. She is an awesome woman. A teacher and she also serves in the help ministry. She has a message for women. Same with T.D. Jakes. These are the major areas I see God nudging me towards so I concentrate my efforts on being equipped to take it on.

I don’t live where they live so I do something to get impacted by them.

…. I stock my library with their books.

I read them.

I pay to gain knowledge from them.

I would rather buy books than fill my closet with clothes and shoes.

One thing that endears me to my mentees who are closest to me is that they love books. That attitude is a magnet between me and them.

You see, purposeful people never stop tilling their ground and tending their garden. They identify what’s important and focus on that. They water the ground and fertilize it with resources that will enrich it and in turn lead to a bumper harvest.

God has placed you in a garden like He did Adam so that you can till it. That garden is your place of purpose.

The law of sowing and reaping is so real. If you invest in your calling, you are bound to excel therein according to your Maker’s standards and if otherwise the obvious.

I keep going on and on about being intentional because it’s the path I have chosen for myself and I desire above many things that you will take this route too. (I did a video on the subject matter and you can watch it HERE

Life is too short to go about it unintentionally.

Take charge of your life.

Invest in things that matter.

Feed your passion.

I can tell you firsthand that only when you live your life purposefully can you have a sense of fulfillment deep within.

“Why spend your money on food that does not give you strength? Why pay for food that does you no good? Listen to me, and you will eat what is good. You will enjoy the finest food.” (Isaiah 55:2)

Purpose is calling on you to give it attention instead of things that will not satisfy you which you are busy investing in.

… Felt strongly to charge you thus today.

I hope you get the message and take action in the right direction from today henceforth . . .

Be blessed!

©OMOSEBI Mary Omolola, PhD

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