Sometime last year, we had to change the tap in the kitchen because it got bad. My husband asked the plumber to get a new one. The guy came in one afternoon with a beautiful tap. It looked really fancy but my mind was telling me it wasn’t a durable one and that the guy must have lied about the price which was rather on the high side, as far as I was concerned. I told my husband about my observation but he thought otherwise.
After the plumber fixed the tap, I stepped up to it and turned it in the direction we used to turn the former one to open but to my surprise, water would not flow out from the tap. So I kept turning it and boom, the control came off the tap.
“You see, I just said so”, was my next line of speech. I went on and on about how he just allowed us waste money. I even told him how it would have been better we bought the tap ourselves and only asked the plumber to fix it. At least, that way we could have been able to ascertain the quality of the tap and be sure that we weren’t being ripped off. (I was considering the fact that we didn’t really have much at hand at the time).
The way I was serious about the fact that I thought that he made a mistake asking the plumber to come and replace the tap ehn #ShakingMyHeadForMyself
His grin all along got me angrier sef.
He took the knob that came off the tap and screwed it back to the tap and then turned in an opposite direction to what I was already used to with the previous tap and water flowed out; even with a better flow pressure than it was applicable with the former tap.
Thankfully, he was calm while trying to make me see that there was no problem with the new tap. But right there, I felt bad. I had to apologize for my show of ignorance.
You see, the problem was actually with me.
Omolola was the wrong one after all.
Almost every time I go to the kitchen and see the new tap, I chuckle at my display of ignorance. Or better still, arrogant ignorance?
My husband can testify to the fact that I am right most times. When I draw a conclusion, it is right almost always. It is more like a gift. I smell trouble from afar. I see invisible signs from a distance and trust me, if I tell you something is wrong with something that seems fine, you can almost bet that I was right.
But this time, I was wrong. Yeah, that is proof that I am human.
Let’s face it…
You can’t be right all the time.
How many times in a year do you conclude in the corner of your heart about someone or make assumptions about why someone acted a certain way? Several for some and maybe just a few for others.
“He didn’t call me because he was thinking about someone else”.
“She didn’t greet me because she hates me”.
“Her smile is fake”.
“Did you say that George is from Oyo state? Then he can’t be trusted”.
. . . So many assumptions that we make, day after day.
But truthfully, assumptions can be deadly. Assumptions can ruin your relationships. I see it happen all the time.
If you are not clear about something or an incidence, ask for clarification instead of taking flight in your heart into a land that does not exist.
The fact that something previously happened a certain way doesn’t automatically mean that it will be like that a next time. People change just as time changes.
Many of us end up hurting ourselves and the people we love when we decide to assume instead of humbly making our concerns known to the person involved and allowing them shed light on the issue.
I urge you today, always remember that because you are human, you are prone to human error in judgement. Don’t yield to the temptation of always drawing conclusions based on only your mental observations. Seek facts as much as you can. Dig deeper into the reasons behind actions.
Let communication be a driving force for your relationship.
Instead of assuming the worst about someone, CHOOSE to believe the best about them.
Note that I am not saying that your instincts should be completely ignored. But be sure that the source of that “hunch” is actually God. Because ,sometimes, it might just be as a result of what you previously heard about the person in question or just some vain observations you have made about the person; which could be wrong after all.
May God heal all relationships that have been harmed because of assumptions and help us all think and act right always.