Deborah laid on a sofa and Daniel, totally engrossed in his computer operation, mistakenly sat on his sister’s toes because he moved backwards without first checking where he was about to rest his bum. As expected, Deborah screamed and Daniel spontaneously jumped to his feet. Deborah was already teary and Daniel apologized to his sister but she still kept groaning.
“But I apologized already. I said sorry more than once”. Daniel claimed (with the tone that communicated: “why are you still crying when I already said sorry”)
I immediately told him that he was wrong to think that the fact that he said “Sorry” will instantaneously ‘delete’ the pain that his sister was feeling. Of course, I commended him for being swift to apologize.
You see, life is full of processes.
We sometimes try to guilt trip others when it seems that they are going through the transitional phase of letting go.
That incidence with our children, Deborah and Daniel, made it really explicit that it is wrong to trivialize the feelings of others.
People are entitled to the way they feel and we should not in any way try to rob them of being themselves. Let them process the event as their personalities would allow.
I think it is wrong to be manipulative by trying to control how other people feel.
Probably you have hurt someone and subsequently SINCERELY apologized but things have not returned to normal or how you have pictured it to be…
Give it time. Give that person time.
The best you could do is to pray for that person’s heart to be healed AFAP (as fast as possible) ☺
You will be amazed at what prayers could do when it comes to the restoration of relationships.
On the flip side, develop the culture of forgiving AFAP too. It is absolutely achieveable though sometimes really difficult.
I just thought to share…
